Reminiscence:

The beginning of the end

Thursday, November 11, 2010

 

11/11/10

Friday, November 12,2010
Don't ever let anyone change you, you understand me?
These words that I can say that they came out from my mother's mouth - Teacher Anne, as she welled up in tears but stood strong holding them back. I have many mothers in my life that have guided me through life. I could almost laugh at myself at this point in life on how I made it so far. Teacher Anne's my mother from Ace-Edventure. She nurtured me for the 11 years that I have been attending Ace-Edventure. What started out as only a student teacher relationship had blossomed into something so magnificent and powerful. We aren't mere students and teachers, we're family. For these 11 years, I had a family. A family that I can go to every week where I shun reality and it's nasty deceptions and conspiracy and just stay inside a small room with twenty other brothers and sisters where we'd sing and play, eat cookies and drink milk for what seems to be mere 2 hours, feels like a lifetime. My heart broken to pieces as I had those words said to me. Don't ever let anyone change you . . . I can't believe myself as I strode down this path where I was at the verge of just throwing away everything. I had changed yet not for the better. I killed myself. Because all I ever thought  about was how to preserve my world and the only thought that came to me was
The world is perfect - without me in it.
As I'd always take a bird's eye view on everyone around me. I thought I was a hindrance to life. I thought that life would be better off without me. I'd put up a facade to live life through acting as though I was welcomed. I'd have thoughts about the people I sit next to, what do they think of me? Am I annoying them? And soon, these thoughts are the only things that coursed through my mind. Till I reached Ace-Edventure, it was home. I could be anybody I wanted to be. But most of all, I could be the one I truly wanted - Myself. And now 11 years later, I'm leaving home. I know I'd be back, but it'll never be the same again. And all this while I'd thought everybody hated me for my personality so I changed. I'd kept my mouth shut for the few days before and on the last day. Something really surprised me. We maybe human,  we maybe flawed, we maybe narcissistic but you know what? They cared for me. They cared for me.

Vincent Tan - Enjoy your life ♥

Jack Leong - Talk to me on Facebook!

Kenneth Gan - Enjoy life, have fun! Call me!

Chun Hoong - Enjoy life! Good luck! =)

John Wong - Live life! Good luck!

Gillian Gan - Chun Yang, I'll definitely miss you!! Thanks for making Thursday class so much fun. ♥you lots. Don't forget me :)

Nick Ng - Hey, you've been the only guy who can get me back up. You're the life of Ace, and you're truly a good friend. I fucking swear I won't forget you, buddy :)

Nikki Yeo - Dear Chun Yang, Please stay cheerful and funny! Do not be quiet! Stay happy and all the best to you! Remember me. I will miss you and your laughter =(

Yee Wan - Dear Bombie! You are not as awesome as me! DUHH! Stay in contact! Miss yarh!

Jit Qi - Dear Chun Yang, Er.... Be yourself. You're awesome enough without trying. All the best in life.

Edwin Ho - Hey big guy! Gonna miss your funny attitude! I wanna see more of it! Will call you. You owe me a slap.

Jonathan Ding - Chun Yang ~White shirts rule. Love your spontaneous and humour. Call me!

Lim Jie Sheng - Keep in touch yea! Hate to lose you!

Li Shing - hey! You're very funny! Rockon. Nice knowing you :) All the best

Yi Wen - All the best!! Fly High! :P


Dearest Chun Yang,
You make it hard to say goodbye! We'll
never ever forget you!
And that's the truth.
Teacher Anne.

Goodbye is hard to say,
When I saw your eyes,
With the tears welling up,
I couldn't but felt only helpless,
Yet somehow between the mixed paradox of smiles and tears,
You told me you were proud,
You told me you love me,
You told me never to let anyone change me,
As you embraced me with a hug that held so long,
I could have seen what coursed through you're mind,
You were always telling me,
How I used to be just so tall where you'd put your hand at table height,
And how you watched me grow up,
Yet you're like a mother to me,
I know I couldn't possibly let you go just yet,
I still need you,
As I reassured you,
Do not shed a tear for that chapter which is soon to be closed,
Whereas shed smiles for the new one that is about to open,
Where I'd say that I won't cry and that I'll be back,
For I remembered,
There are two things we should give our children: one is roots and the other is wings,
Roots to know where they came from,
And wings for them to soar high in the sky,
It was Hodding Cater Jr. and that quote never escaped me,
And you have showered us with both,
And as I came home tonight,
I cried for what was the most memorable night of my life,
And then I reminded myself,
It is not easy for us to say goodbye,
So how about a see you again instead,
Hoping for another crossing in our path of life,
So yeah wipe those tears away,
Because we have yet to say goodbye,
See you again another day . . .
Ace-Edventure

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